🔗 Share this article

“Well, conditions are quite harsh here. We’re advising all of our clients to commit their entire holdings into canned food and shotguns.” That bit of shrewd guidance comes from the Brain Gremlin – a lab-engineered, speaking, spectacled member of the slick creature crowd that infests Manhattan’s high-tech Clamp Tower skyscraper in director Joe Dante’s unhinged continuation Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Superficially, it’s merely an portfolio pointer from one monster to another. But, curiously, it’s also pretty solid existential counsel. Seriously, consider my perspective.

When things go bad, the worst thing you can do is approach matters with excessive gravity. The Brain Gremlin understands this. In fact, the majority of the dentally-gifted beasts that populate Dante’s chaotic 1990 feature (possibly his finest) possess the same sly, self-aware funny bone regarding the blurry line separating daily routine and unadulterated chaos. It’s a particular aspect of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that maintains my loyalty – and with the passage of time, it’s the theme that echoes the loudest.

An Early Life Fascination

Understandably, my attachment to this movie wasn’t born on such an introspective level. As a child, we were limited to a few scratched-up video tapes at home. Included within that collection were Gremlins and its second chapter, the latter housed in a chunky ex-rental box likely purchased from an non-chain rental store and boasting snarling creatures on its knackered cover. I was right away smitten and these films wasted no time embedding themselves inside my tiny, impressionable mind. After that point, they became an almost-daily part of my childhood viewing routine.

Dante’s original usually receives all the accolades, thanks largely to its reputation as a semi-scary seasonal fave – and let me be clear, I’ve watched Gremlins more times than I can count. Nevertheless, its successor seldom receives the same level of high regard, which feels criminal. As a kid, I’d invariably jump at the prospect to watch Gremlins 2. During long summer holidays, I’d lock myself inside and pop it in. When I acquired my personal TV-VHS combo unit, it continued playing looped in my bedroom. Over time, it became deeply rooted in my mental framework. If my parents observed this fixation, they gave no indication of concern.

Hidden Rewards and Cultural Easter Eggs

As I got older, new revelations enhanced frequent screenings, heightening the enjoyment of watching small emerald creatures gleefully trash a New York high-rise. I learned the future-focused property magnate and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was based squarely upon future president Donald Trump, with his red-headed employee Marla (Haviland Morris) alluding to his one-time partner Marla Maples. Fortunately, Clamp possesses greater compassion than his real-life counterpart.

The “doomsday” video Clamp plays during maximum monster mayhem? I discovered it was based on a real-life “Doomsday” video commissioned by the CNN boss Ted Turner in case the world truly faced apocalypse. I noticed how Dante made a special effort to film alternate cuts of a meta sequence where Gremlins take over the very film you’re watching. A version for theaters, a separate one for tape and broadcast, each providing a grinning portion of self-referential entertainment sorcery prior to the concept being mainstream.

A Persistent Influence

While it was makeup maestro Rick Baker’s fantastically vile creatures that captured my attention as a child, this subsurface richness held my interest as an adult. In time, I even spoke to Dante about it myself and he had no hesitation revealing to me he made the movie with the specific aim of ridiculing those who loved its absurd-yet-genuine predecessor and wanted more. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he cheerfully disclosed. This anarchic defiance and commitment to not take his sequel as seriously as his Warner Bros bosses clearly wanted him to, only deepened my appreciation further.

When I experienced a sudden family bereavement recently, I was astonished to realize that, during my heightest mourning, all I felt compelled to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Weird, right? Maybe not. The soothing reminiscence it offered was essential to weaken my mind’s mourning mire – but the perspectives it had imparted to me as an adult were just as useful.

Like Gremlins rampaging through a genetics laboratory, there’s some things in life you just can’t control. Dante knows it. The Brain Gremlin shares this wisdom. Sometimes, you have to be like them: accept the turmoil, commit your entire being into canned food and shotguns and try not to approach life with excessive gravity.

It’s powerful existential guidance from a very unlikely source – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will always be my feelgood film.